by 
I asked the wives this question, and now, I’m going to turn around and ask it to you…
For me, my wedding day was an interesting day. I was staying with my groomsmen in a room in a hotel the night before. They gave me the cot! And that morning I forgot that I had all the toiletries in my get-a-way car. I had to shave in the church’s bathroom sink!
Remember back to your day– the day that you stood in front of the whole congregation as your bride came down the aisle and everyone rose to their feet. That day when something happened at the wedding you’ll never forget– and it wasn’t saying “I do” to your sweetheart but it could have been anything from the wedding party that wasn’t in the reception to the ring bearer who kept stepping on your shoe during the prayer because he had done that with your father the night before.
In any case, you said certain things before God and some gathered witnesses. You may have said things like “love, honor, cherish” or “for better or worse, richer or poorer, sickness and in health” or things of that nature. Do you realize the gravity of those vows before God?
Check out these verses on the topic:
When thou vowest a vow unto God, defer not to pay it; for he hath no pleasure in fools: pay that which thou hast vowed. Better is it that thou shouldest not vow, than that thou shouldest vow and not pay. – Ecclesiastes 5:4-5
Remember Jephthah? He made a vow before the Lord in Judges 11:29-40 where he pledged to give God as a burnt offering the first thing that came out of his door when he returned to his home. That ended up being his little daughter– and regardless of how Jephthah fulfilled this vow (whether through killing the daughter or sending her away to the Lord’s service) he was bound to comply.
So with us, men, when we give our word it is our bond. I know that I, as a man, am typically a whole lot more loyal than I should be. We should make sure that our loyalty is to God and our wives, and that we are men of our words– loving, honoring and cherishing them.
Like a lot of the things in the Christian life, if we’re not going forward in Christ, then we are falling away from Him– so is this command to uphold your vows. If you’ve been failing in this area (or if you fail) then you need to seek repentance and get it right with God and your wife.
- Godly Husband: You Must Be Born Again
- Godly Husband: Are You a Leader?
- Godly Husband: Is She Your Helper or Your Slave?
- Godly Husband: You Must be a Lover
- Godly Husband: You Must Be a Protector
- Godly Husband: Do You Do Too Much?
- Godly Husband: Using Your Perspective
- Godly Husband: What Do You Care Most About?
- Godly Husband: How Well Do You Know Your Wife?
- Godly Husband: Are You There?
- Godly Husband: How is Your Thought Life?
- Godly Husband: How Are You Treating “Your” Body
- Godly Husband: Are You Pro-Active?
- Godly Husband: Are You Precise?
- Godly Husband: Are You Keeping Your Wedding Vows?
- Godly Husband: Are You a Provider?
- Godly Husband: Do You Nourish and Cherish Your Wife?
This is another good post, I especially liked the part about Jephthah! Can’t remember reading that before. Wow. Now I’m going to have to go read “the rest of the story”…
Btw, what did you mean by this: “I know that I, as a man, am typically a whole lot more loyal than I should be.”
I guess I may have gone too far? I thought that typical men are a whole lot more stubborn/loyal on things than women tend to be. I’ll stick out a bad situation (whether it be problems in a church, etc.). But now that I think about, I have to question whether I tend to be more loyal when it’s “easy” than when it’s more difficult. Thanks for making me think.
Thanks for answering. I was having a hard time wrapping my thoughts around what would be considered “too loyal”. I understand now. I think putting it in terms of church loyalty was a good way to explain it. Church splits have a way of showing you just where your loyalties lie, and how strong they are.