I don’t know exactly the first moment I understood the point of discipline. For years, I had been under it, and that first point of
understanding may have come from a summer music camp at which I was a counselor. During one of the training sessions, we discussed discipline and it’s roll with the teens that were about to be coming on campus. The head counselor spoke about how we discipline so that they, in turn, would discipline themselves.
Now that I have kids of my own, I’m still following that principle. I do spank my children. I was spanked as a child, and I believe it works. I endeavor to spank out of love, and not anger. I try to use it as a training tool, not a venting tool.
Some may argue that my “hitting” and then not allowing my child to hit other children causes a rational problem. My wife asked a similar question a few months back. How do we teach our children it’s ok to throw a ball, but not another toy? Should we ban all throwing?
In my parent’s house, there were only certain few foods that the children were allowed to drink a soft drink. However, my father was allowed to have a soda any time he wished. In my parent’s house, we each had different bed times, and my parents were always the last ones to bed.
In each of these cases, there were different sets of rules for different groups. Same with spanking. Parents are allowed to discipline their children in this way, children are not to hit others.
It’s also illogical to try to compare spanking to assault and battery (normal or sexual) between adults. For one thing, children (at times) need some kind of physical reaction to a wrong accomplished. That’s why you send them to their room, place them in a time out chair, or whatever you do whether or not you spank. However, if you send them to their room, you might also have to include “no computer”. If they’re younger, how do you expect their young minds to associate being sent to their room with something they did wrong– especially if it was something they were not supposed to touch? Furthermore, I find that it just gives them time to get angry.
A simple light slap on the hand can instantly tell a young child not to touch mom’s new vase. It’s immediate. They know what it’s about. Now, that isn’t efficient for older children, but you tailor your discipline for the age level. I don’t ever remember being spanked as a teenager.
Lastly, the Biblical aspect. The Bible has multiple things to say about discipline. It says that God chastens those He loves. It shows that God is the only one that can fit the punishment to the crime. It tells fathers not to provoke their children to wrath. It tells children to obey their parents. It talks about sparing the rod and spoiling the child. An honest search of the Scriptures will yield a great understanding of what God’s thoughts are on how to raise children.