by Rebecca Hagelin has been tackling the issue of modesty in clothing for a few articles now. The current article is an encouragement to parents that are looking for modest clothing– it is out there. What I found fascinating was the stand that they took in their house regarding visitors that come in dressed incorrectly.
Occasionally, a girl visits wearing something inappropriate – a midriff-baring shirt, a short skirt, a low neckline. I smile and say, “God made you a person of value. You’re somebody special who deserves to be respected. So when you’re in my home, I want you to dress in a way that reflects the treasure you are. So let’s go upstairs. You can pick out anything you like to cover up while you’re here.” There may be a gasp – often, nobody’s ever told them that their body is a treasure to be respected. But then they get it. And you know what? A bond is created, and they appreciate what I’m doing.
Also, she makes a good point about how clothing impacts men. Speaking as a man, I can tell you that how a girl/woman dresses definitely inpacts my impression of them– clothes say a lot about a person, and the majority of clothes out there now are advertising something I don’t think fathers want
their daughters advertising.Women and girls who decide to dress modestly often have another surprise in store – men and boys treat them differently. In the book “Dressing with Dignity,” former model Colleen Hammond explains why:
I believe it is because, subconsciously, men can read women’s body language. If they see a woman who dresses with dignity and carries herself with grace and femininity, they pick up on that. They take it as a sign to approach her with the respect, reverence and honor a woman ought to have.
Exactly. And if a girl dresses like a streetwalker, they pick up the opposite
message. Is that the signal we want our daughters to send?
So true! Even tho me and my sis have been taught this our whole lives, sometimes we still have a hard time cuz we want guys to ‘notice’ us… one of our good friends wrote this and posted it on his website: http://www.devinswecker.com/deargirls.php
it’s totally awesome! check it out!
-Kathleen
I love your site!! You make so many awesome points! You’re right; most fathers don’t like the clothes their daughters are wearing, but unfortunately the mother usually encourages looking “right” to fit in. Kinda sad, ain’t it?
I think girls more than guys are pressured to conform to what they see is “normal”. Their peers dress that way, actresses and models dress that way. But it cheapens them and sends the wrong message. I’m not advocating burqas, but a little more decency would be great!
MIn, as always, good stuff! I’d have to definitely agree with the bit of how men treat women different on the basis of how they dress. Also, your comment on peer dependency is spot on.