Ouch! What a tough question! What were your vows to your husband?
I can remember some time ago I was at a family gathering and we were watching the video tape of a wedding ceremony in front of a judge (justice of the peace) for a cousin of mine that had a baby out of wedlock. It came time for the vows, and the husband-to-be (now ex) made a joke that the judge should make sure to have “obey” in the vows for her, not him. I share this illustration to say that we as a society do not hold marriage vows like God does.
Remember back to your day– the day that you came down the aisle dressed in white. That day when something happened at the wedding you’ll never forget– and it wasn’t saying “I do” to your sweetheart but it could have been anything from the wedding party that wasn’t in the reception to “Help Me” written on the soles of your shoes.
In any case, you said certain things before God and some gathered witnesses. You may have said things like “love, honor, cherish” or “for better or worse, richer or poorer, sickness and in health” or things of that nature. Do you realize the gravity of those vows before God?
Check out these verses on the topic:
When thou vowest a vow unto God, defer not to pay it; for he hath no pleasure in fools: pay that which thou hast vowed. Better is it that thou shouldest not vow, than that thou shouldest vow and not pay. – Ecclesiastes 5:4-5
Numbers 30:2ff has even more to say, but I think that you get the point. Your vow before God means something to God. It means that if you are not fulfilling your vow, you are in sin.
Like a lot of the things in the Christian life, if we’re not going forward in Christ, then we are falling away from Him– so is this command to uphold your vows. If you’ve been failing in this area (or if you fail) then you need to seek repentance and get it right with God and your husband.
Question Idea taken from Questions for a Godly Wife
- Godly Wife: Is He Your Master?
- Godly Wife: Who Are You Seeking to Please?
- Godly Wife: Are You His Helper or His Obstacle?
- Godly Wife: Does Your Husband’s Heart Trust in You?
- Godly Wife: How Do You Handle When He is Wrong?
- Godly Wife: How do you Handle Disagreements?
- Godly Wife: How Do You Receive Correction?
- Godly Wife: Are You Drawing Him to You with Your Speech?
- Godly Wife: How Does Your Husband Grow?
- Godly Wife: Who Trains the Children?
- Godly Wife: How Do You Make Your Husband Feel?
- Godly Wife: Are You Intimately Available?
- Godly Wife: Do You Speak To Your Husband with Flattering Words?
- Godly Wife: Are You Helping Your Husband to Greater Heights?
- Godly Wife: Are You Keeping Your Wedding Vows?
- Godly Wife: Do You Dominate Your Husband?
- Godly Wife: Have You Cut the Cord?